Title: I Believe You Now

Author: danceswithgary (danceswithgary@yahoo.com)

Pairing: Clark/Lex, Clark/Ollie

Rating: R

Warnings: None

Spoilers: None

Word Count: 1550

Archive: Fine, just let me know

Summary: Clark has something to confess to Lex.

 

 

I Believe You Now

 

 

"So you do still exist, even though it seems you've forgotten what a phone or a computer is. It doesn't seem quite fair, Clark. You can run across the state in a few seconds, but I'm the one who ends up driving two hours after spending a very lonely month in Japan."

 

The creaky stairs up to the loft had kept no secrets when it came to announcing his visitor's arrival. Clark tried to keep his tone light as he responded, although he refused to turn from the window, where he was pretending to watch the sunset, and meet the other man's eyes. "It's usually a three-hour trip, Lex."

 

A bright flash of laughter greeted that patently absurd statement, just as Clark had anticipated. "Not in a Ferrari." The deceptive strength of the slim arms that circled his waist was also as he'd expected, and Clark struggled to hold himself in check, to prevent his body from relaxing back into the gentle force. "I missed you, big guy." Gentle chiding made his battle even more difficult. "Hey, relax. I'm here now and in one piece."

 

 

"I can't hand this over to anyone else. As much as I hate leaving you alone for so long, I have to fly over there and handle the meetings face-to-face. Teleconferencing isn't enough when it comes to making all the connections this deal needs. There'll be on-site inspections, negotiations, lawyers and lobbyists, state dinners to attend...all necessary and completely unavoidable. I'm sorry."

 

 

Clark's shoulders stiffened as warm puffs of sweet breath stirred the curls at the base of his neck. Puzzlement was clear in Lex's question, tension building in his tightening grasp. "What's going on here?"

 

 

White fire sears wherever pale fingers stroke, branding invisible sigils of possession that sink deep while love takes brief leave. Blue steel, bright promise...that any other could match lips, hands, heart...a cruel thought so beyond belief...and yet....

 

 

Aged wood creaked under Clark's hands as he clenched his fists, the air too heavy to breathe, the burden of guilt pressing down until he was sure that he'd never be able to move freely again. Heart leaden within his straining chest, he fumbled for the words required, a long-dreaded confession forcing its way past his trembling lips. "I...Lex...there's something I need to tell you. It's about O...Oliver. And...me." 

 

 

"Listen. I can't help the way I feel. He's always had it out for me and, since we've been together, he.... Hell. I've seen how Queen looks at you."

 

"I don't understand what you're talking about, Lex. How does he look?"

 

"Like he wants what I have. As if he'd give anything...everything...to touch you...like this."

 

 

Lex's withdrawal, although subtle, was still far enough to tease forth tendrils of pain, as if someone had rendered green crystal judgment. The loss of his touch left Clark gasping with regret, and then Lex's words stole any remaining strength. "Is he the reason why you won't look at me, Clark? Did he finally win you over while I wasn't around?"

 

 

"You need to look at this. Here's what my source came up with...right there. Luthor's still running the damn experiments."

 

 

"Lex, I...I never meant for it to happen, never meant to hurt you. He came to me with...proof."

 

 

"He lied when he said he was shutting everything down. You claim he's changed, but Luthor's been playing you for a fool all along, Clark."

 

 

"Proof of what exactly? What have I been accused of in my absence?"

 

 

"He convinced us not to blow up that lab, even let Bart go when you asked him...but he never meant to quit. All Luthor wanted was you...in his bed. Now that he's got you, he thinks he can go on doing whatever he wants...whenever he wants."

 

 

Unable to summon an immediate response, Clark froze in place...until the click-tap of a quiet retreat brought him wheeling about, his hand reaching out to stop Lex before he could leave. When Lex halted, Clark released him despite Lex's refusal to turn and look at him. Clark crossed his arms, but the action did nothing to relieve the ache of empty arms robbed of their unearthly power, his bitter regret almost too heavy to bear. "Lex, please. I need you to understand what happened."

 

 

"I have to check this out myself, Oliver. I can't just take some stranger's word for it. Wait here. I'll be back...one way or another."

 

 

"I didn't want to believe what he told me, but when I went to the warehouse that Oliver claimed you were using as a front, I heard the name 'Luthor.' The setup was the same as in the labs you shut down, the evidence...." Clark's voice faltered as he recalled his despair at the sight of equipment meant solely for investigating the effects of kryptonite on humans.

 

 

"I'm sorry, Clark. I know how much this must hurt. Just remember, you have friends...me...ready and willing to help you forget what Luthor's done."

 

 

"When I got back, Oliver was waiting for me, just like I asked. It was a bad idea. I was in so much pain that I needed...something, anything."

 

 

"Let me take care of you, Clark. He's never been the right person for someone like you. I know what you need. Come here."

 

 

The slump of the shoulders in front of him tore at Clark's heart. His throat closed on his confession, his words of contrition imprisoned behind suddenly vulnerable flesh. He resorted to a slow shuffle, circumnavigating into Lex's sight, forcing the other man to shift back a step and grant Clark space. "It wasn't until he kissed me that I realized that something wasn't...right."

 

 

The shock of lips...the wrong lips...intruded into unseeing grief. Slick chill where scarred heat once held sway, the wrong scent, the wrong taste, the wrong touch, not Lex...and a bone-deep understanding that an unforgivable mistake had just been made.

 

 

Although Clark felt he deserved the bitter sneer, it still cut deep. "So you let me drive all the way out here instead of calling me or showing up at the penthouse to break up with me? Was it just too much trouble...or was that all part of the calculated punishment for my nonexistent crimes?"

 

 

"No, Oliver! I don't want this. I don't want...you. There's something...I'm going to check that warehouse again. There has to be something I missed. Lex wouldn't lie to me. I know it!"

 

 

Dropping to his knees, Clark bowed his head in shame. His hands dangled at his sides, flexing with the need to touch, to reassure. Somehow, he found the strength to choke out, "I couldn't say anything without seeing you first. I was afraid...and I was hoping it would give me more time to think of the right words to say how sorry I am that I doubted you, how to ask you to forgive me."

 

 

"You knew all along that it was Lionel, didn't you? Did you honestly think I was so stupid that I wouldn't have Chloe check the property records for me? Why would you deliberately try to smear Lex's name like that, Oliver?"

 

 

"Did he do anything more than kiss you, Clark?"

 

"No!" The denial tore free from Clark's lips as he raised his head. Blue eyes darkened to flint-gray and Clark could trace the tracks of pain around Lex's mouth despite the dimming light. Leaning forward, Clark rested his forehead against Lex's hip, thankful that he wasn't left flailing for support on Lex's retreat. Tilting his face, he mumbled into the soft wool, "It all felt so wrong, Lex. That's how I knew it couldn't have been you. Please believe me. Please."

 

Heartened by Lex's silent acceptance, Clark raised trembling hands to bracket Lex's slim hips, his thumbs settling into the deep notches to rub gently. A soft hiss encouraged him to continue, and he shifted to rub his face against the silk of Lex's shirt, savoring the slight catch of the weave against his five o'clock shadow. Quick pale fingers opened belt, button, and zipper to allow Clark access, and he moaned at the lack of further barriers. A familiar musk teased his nostrils as he pushed the constraining fabric away, and he nosed deeper into the shadowed cleft to gather more. 

 

Softness awaited him, strong emotion suppressing where in the past a ready length would have greeted him. Drawing the soft globes beneath into his hungry mouth, one after the other, he was heartened by the response, the warm brush against his cheek. A hand slipped through his hair, tickling the edge of his ear before clenching and directing him to eager need. Heavy on his tongue, stretching his lips, filling the spaces he'd feared would remain forever empty, salt-slick.

 

Slow tempo reigned until the rising moon washed through the window, and Clark wanted nothing for himself but the taste, the sweet taste and low cry of fulfillment. Silent tears washed the ivory curve beneath his hand and gathered in the hollow of the hip that had cradled his sorrow. Sweet fervent whispers promised him love and, with each caress, he received benediction.

 

Forgiven.

 

 

fin

 

***

 

Do You Believe Me Now (Jimmy Wayne - SONGS FOR MY GOOD GIRL)

 

Do you remember the day I turned to you and said

I didn't like the way he was lookin' at you, yeah

And how he made you laugh

You just couldn't get what I was sayin'

It was my imagination

 

[Chorus]

So do you believe me now?

I guess I really wasn't that crazy

And I knew what I was talkin' ‘bout

Every time the sun goes down

He's the one that's holdin' you baby

Yeah, and me I'm missin' you way across town

So do you believe me now?

 

I'm kickin' myself for bein' the one foolish enough

Givin' him the chance to step in my shoes, oh

He was bidin' his time when he saw our love was havin'

A moment of weakness, he was there between us

 

[Chorus]

 

Ooh yeah, I bet now you see the light

Ooh yeah, what's the use in bein' right?

When I'm the lonely one tonight

 

[Chorus]

 

 

***

 

Notes: After the umpteenth time of turning on the radio and hearing this playing, this story had to be written - despite all the WIPs I already had waiting. As always, many thanks to my beta, jakrar - any remaining mistakes are mine, of course.

 

Standard Disclaimer:  I do not own any of the characters herein. The characters of Lex Luthor and Clark Kent as well as any supporting characters are the property of their creators and DC Comics. Gough/Millar Inc and the WB Network TV own Smallville. Any deviation (or deviant behavior) from the originals, however, is mine.

 

Feedback is both welcome and appreciated.

 

 

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